Martha L Garmon

“Let me know if there is anything I can do?” Caregivers hear this phrase a lot. We know you are sincere, but most of us do not want to ask for help. It is much easier to accept when a specific offer is made. Many of the things we need are mundane and it seems wrong to ask help with chores. However, if you offer to do something specific, it doesn’t feel as awkward. If you live nearby, ask if you can help with routine errands such as picking up or returning library books or DVDs. Say, “Hey, I’m going to the library, do you need me to pick up a book or do you have any books you need returned?” or “I’m going to the Redbox, do you have any movies you would like to see or any that need to be returned?” I know in my household, movies and books are frequently forgotten until the last moment and at the most inconvenient time. (Thankfully, I have gone almost entirely digital or I would be paying late fees continually!) If you make regular trips to the library or video store you could make a stan...

  Caprese salad in a wonton cup This is one of Stephan’s favorite phrases. He starts about 4:30 pm asking, “When’s dinner?” I usually try to put him off until 5:30 pm, but the request just gets more and more urgent the longer I wait. I could give him a hamburger every night and he would be fine with that, but frankly, I get bored and, as much as I like to cook, there are some days that I am just not up to the task.  What are some ways to make buying groceries and preparing meals a bit easier? Let’s start with groceries. When Stephan first was diagnosed, I could still leave him at home by himself long enough to go to the grocery store. I could even take him with me and he could help with the grocery shopping. We had an app on our phones that allowed us to share the grocery list. I could send him off to retrieve items on the list while I found other items.  As the disease progressed, I was able to leave him for shorter and shorter amounts of time and taking him with me was ...

  That’s the first thing that comes to mind when you hear that someone is facing a crisis, illness, death, etc. I’m an excellent cook (I was a finalist in the Cook of the Week competition in Chicago), but even I am thankful for the meals that are delivered by friends. There are some pros and cons to bringing meals to a caregiver. There are also alternatives to bringing a casserole that will work whether you live down the street or across the country.  First let’s discuss the pros and cons of bringing meals. Pros for the caregiver include not having to cook one or more nights, fewer nights for meal planning, and less time and money spent at the grocery store. All of these pros help to conserve the caregiver’s energy and resources at a time when these resources are being stretched to the limit. It may seem like a small thing, but sometimes a small thing is all we need to remind us that we are not alone. Cons for the caregiver include getting too many meals at once, getting food ...